A new alternative has arrived for the wife beater singlet that so many of us love to wear in summer. Fashion pimp's Kr3w Apparel have produced the TK Too Live Vest. A mock bullet proof vest that is begging for a cap to be popped off into it.

At the very least when you are found dead in an alley way, your next of kin can recognise you in your blood soaked designer threads. The team at Kr3w might be onto something big here. They could be spawning a community of DIY apparel modders. I can see it now.

Right after quilting at the local community college. The street wear modders appear, blinding the little old ladies with there bling as they leave the class. The first weeks lesson is on how to add lead plates into your fancy dress bullet proof vest. Although really it should come with an imitation lead finish as standard, just to give it a life saving look.

Quite honestly, this has got to be one of the lamest things I have ever seen. The kelvar hoodie wins hands down.

Former soviet heavy weight Mikhail Gorbachev has stepped away from perestroika to strut his stuff for Louis Vuitton. He has been photographed in a car sitting next to a Vuitton man bag, driving along Mühlenstraße which famously hosts a cold war icon: the Berlin Wall. Quite a nice picture, I can easily imagine Gorbachev as Russian mafia carrying cash for a hit.

It is interesting that his birth mark is one of his most distinguishing features. Would he be as memorable without the skin blemish, thus chosen for a French luxury fashion label. Each to their own, as Cindy Crawford has her mole.

Testing beer is an activity that consumes many blokes on a weekly basis. Though some struggle to test more than one beer. Luckily Choice magazine has produced findings which will avoid future conundrum's at your local watering hole.

Throwing down the gauntlet, Choice tested 46 premium beers available in Australia. Unfortunately the Victorian backwash also known as VB has tied the top spot with Tooheys New. It boggles me as to what Victorians eat that is so sweet they need to wash it down with some beer that could substitute for acid.

There is no doubt, growing up, VB seems like a kings beer. Any 16 year old drinker would think highly of themselves when trying to swallow whole a six pack acquired from an older sibling. New has gained quite a lot of credibility at the pub I've noticed. If it's coming out of a bottle, for me, it's an awkward choice. Victoria has scarred me for life in being able to trust a beer in a brown bottle.

The beer to trust with a clear bottle is Tooheys Extra Dry, better known to some as TED. It flows so gracefully you can use it as an alternative to water. TED gave me a welcome reminder of home when in England. What else does an Australian do when traveling in London, find the first Australian pub. Upon realisation a high five was thrown up to my mate who decalred: "They have Extra Dry!".

Browsing eBay recently I came to the shock realisation that it has become a legitimate cesspool for crack heads feeding their illegal habit. At least it continues the stereotype that the Hip Hop genre is surrounded by individuals possessed on some sort of narcotic. In the end you're off your face. You come to the sudden thought - that to maximise your mellowed state you need some tunes. Unfortunately that dude in the mirror who looks just like you hocked all your tracks online.

Even better is the second definition of crack on the Urban Dictionary:

Crack is something that is sold by both drug dealers and prostitutes. The only difference is that a prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.

Social networking wave maker Facebook also has a virtual marketplace. The competitive edge being you sell to your friends, groups or networks rather then the world. Surely someone has incorrectly described an item under the "Other" when really they are referring to an illicit substance.

At the Town Hall steps on Wednesday I saw street performers pushing the awareness of disposing cigarette butts appropriately. This coincides with the new smoking bans.

Pubs and clubs in neighbor states NSW and VIC must abide by new indoor smoking legislation come Monday morning. At last I can come home not smelling like I've spent the night in a chimney. The funny thing I discovered by speaking to smokers is they themselves hate the smell when they get home - so why do it?

For this to have a blanket effect as desired the ban needs to be enforced in all public areas. The Italians have been at the forefront of this. With on the spot individual fines. Doubled if pregnant women or children are close by and fines to the venue.

The problem still exists as people tend to gravitate to the usually outside smoking section of an establishment. As patrons with the portable cancer pack depart with friends in tow to rejuvenate there lungs with tar.

Caught the current series of Big Brother the other day. One of the male house mates is a corsetier. A profession that I thought would only exist in a sweat shop in China. To make himself stand out even more, he wears them himself.

Whenever I see a corset I think back to old western movies where female characters always wore corsets. In particular prostitutes. Must say that contemporary corsets produce a splendid figure when warn by women of all shapes. Interesting that the traditional corsets are not functional and require a helping hand for the lacing. Pushing the extreme of aesthetics over function in fashion. In terms of pain and discomfort, consider the Chinese women who bound there feet for a millennium.

The media is putting a lot of focus on who or what is the greenest of them all. Public concern is growing, so the more FUD spread, the world can benefit.

Recently I purchased a gift from Angus & Robertson for the lady that loves me most. Day's later I was pleasantly surprised that the A&R carry bag I was provided with was 100% degradable. This little beauty was designed by Maxpak Australasia. The Envirogreen plastic bag is designed to break down and degrade by heat, oxidation and sunlight.

Which is interesting as some people like to reuse shopping bags. Possibly causing people's possessions spilling onto the street after the third use, but imagine the extreme. A young professional purchases that dress she has been saving up for by Alex Perry. Leaves the store with the frock in a degradable bag. The bag doesn't even last five meters and the dress spills out onto the footpath.

Being green has even extended to the high brow crowd. When fine dining, instead of requesting for bottled water, the trend is to ask for tap water. This is great, as the environmental cost of producing something that is available without a bottle is huge. One of the most hated items on the bill that bloke's cringe at paying for is water. Who can really charge for something that is basically a dollar a tonne.

News big daddy, Rupert Murdoch, recently announced that News Corp will be carbon neutral by 2010. Alas doing so will be easier for fewer rather than many, but increasing the demand for green technologies and initiatives will make them more accessible to smaller players. Murdoch's goal doesn't compare to what Darwin accountant took upon himself upon to save the environment.

Wayne has worn the same pair of pants, five days a week for 2 years. Only to wash them on the weekend. With the bonus chance of wearing them again on Saturday night. What an environmental hero, he could file my tax return any day!

I've be preaching for years that being a geek is cool, potentially chic. Don't confuse a geek with a nerd, it breaches a blood feud that been spanning a millennia.

Generally speaking you want to dress comfortably. There is only so far away you can get from home with your, hanging by the threads, Adidas track suit. Just as you would with life, you compromise. We men want to wear our super comfortable cardigan's and show the world while we are at it. Long have women abused this privilege, by taking it to extremes of cross breading them with trench coats. Spawning sorry excuses for knee length cardigan's.

Nerd Big Brother house mate Jamie greeted Gretel on opening night wearing a brown cardigan. He is one for sure that is not concerned with the label that is attached to his cardigan. He should be congratulated for being comfortable on TV. High school maths teachers have be this flaunting for years.

These flatly knitted warm but cool fashion statements are durable. Not only do they withstand the battering of chalk infected maths teachers, they also possess life saving properties. An assassination attempt by the Bulgarian Secret Service and KGB in Paris on Vladimir Kostov was foiled in 1978. Why? He was wearing a thick woolen cardigan.

Thanks to Rob at Signified for the idea on this post.

Personally I'm not really a fan of music reviews, but today I did buy Hilltop Hoods - The Hard Road: Restrung which happens to be the day it came out. It hits the streets a year after the original was released, minus the strings. Initially the Hoods did really well, they got commercial air play and won a bunch of recording artist awards.

Growing up I learnt the piano which produced within me a continual appreciation for classical music. More recently I have been fascinated with Australia Hip Hop and these boys are on top of it.

Throwing the CD into the player I was hoping to relive the experience from Metallica's unrehearsed and recorded live S&M album. My hopes were short lived as all aspects were studio recorded. It would be my guess the a capella's were extracted from the original album tape's and pieced together after recording the Adelaide Symphony Orchestra (ASO). Nonetheless there are some nice surprises.

The track order is not the same, surprising as the artwork almost is. Restrung features a complete new track called Roll On Up. You do want something new when buying something you already have. My favorite is Pressure's new verse in What A Great Night, unexpected and keeps you glued to the speaker hoping you can find any more easter eggs.

Probably my biggest gripe is that the swearing has been cut out. It breaks the flow of the track and at first you think the CD has skipped. I can see the logic, it will make the CD just that little bit more appealing to the classical listeners. For those who know the track and sing along will find it harder to enjoy the rest of the song.

To me, any artist who does a mash up with an orchestra deserves high praise. Showing maturity and respect for other genre's, making them more human than rock star. Tonight the Hilltop Hoods will be performing live with the ASO, I hope it produces another DVD like The Calling Live.

Driving into the city on the weekend I noticed a billboard showing a bloke's arse (in undies), promoting aussieBum. They are the gourmet equivalent of Bonds briefs, with the increased price tag. The main selling point is Wonderjock, the man version of the Wonderbra. Rather than tucking your nuts away, aussieBum jocks have a kangaroo like pouch that push them forward. Now you can show the world that you have something below the belt. This is awesome for the metrosexual men keen on insinuating his sexual organ. Supposedly they are popular in Europe, but that is to be expected. Europeans are nuts for getting there balls out.

In the last week they launched the budgie smuggler (Speedo style) swim wear range. Now the unsuspecting public will think you have a whole flock tucked away and that your about to take them for a swim. Can't say that I'm a fan. The boardies look okay, as long they don't have any enhancing properties. All the promotional stuff looks quite gay and can be hard to look at for a straight guy. A typical bloke doesn't want to know what a male model does for fun whilst wearing only undies. I think it would be easier to watch man power warm up. Even Pat Rafter wears a singlet when modeling for Bonds.

Alternatively, aussieBum could be actually marketing to females. Who will buy these jocks for there partners, subconsciously thinking that they can make there man hotter. They are not easy to come by. Made available only online leaving out a good chunk of the undie wearing population. Shame about try before you buy.